Healing the Orphan Inside

The Orphan Inside


In my last post I talked about the Trinity healing your soul and related it to the “Trinity Window.” Let me display it for you again:

 (Note: When I refer to the soul needs, please understand I mean the body, soul and spirit needs.)

                                      Trinity Window


                                          Body, Soul & Spirit Needs

Relationship                                                                                     Trinity

Father ————— Care (provision) ———–Father God      

                                                 Condition (protection)

                                                Character (identity)                            

Siblings/friends —— Companionship ————Jesus


Mother ————- Comfort ——————Holy Spirit

                                              Coach (teach)

                                              Cultivate (nurture)



Let’s continue to talk about the wounds that occur when the relationships in our lives don’t happen the way we desire. This is directly connected to our soul (mind, will and emotions) having it’s needs met (see the chart above).

Our earthly fathers are supposed to protect us, provide for us, and speak identity into us. Our siblings/ friends are to be our companions and communicate with us. Our mothers are to comfort, teach and nurture us. If that doesn’t happen, we have soul wounds the Trinity want to heal.

So, did your father meet the above needs for you? How about your siblings, friends or mother? If not, do you think you have any soul wounds? Even if your needs were well-met, do you still think you may have some kind of soul wounds?

If your answer is yes then read on.


The Orphan Spirit and your soul, spirit and body:

When we experience rejection, relationship abandonment, and/or being or feeling left out, then this creates an orphan mentality. In some circles of belief, it’s defined as an Orphan Spirit. This is the driving force behind an adopted (orphan’s)  RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder). For the rest of us, the Orphan Spirit attaches to the wounds in our soul and creates a internal orphaned feeling. This causes us to react negatively in relationship situations.

Abba Father is the master of ceremonies when it comes to healing the Orphan Spirit. That is why I have called my blog “Abba Father and His Love.” Father God can remove the lies and wounds our soul believes about yourselves and sometimes what we wrongly believe about others. Then there are times when we are dead on in our discernment about the intentions of others towards us. Father God can heal that too. He can remove the lies and wounds and replaces them with His truth.

If you’re reacting to your adopted child’s rejection towards you then please reflect again on the chart above. Don’t get me wrong, we are beings with feelings and God made us that way. The intentions of your orphan’s RAD heart is to inflict as much pain to your heart as possible. This is true. But some of the rejection feelings may have taken root long before your orphan child was in your home.

When you were growing up did you feel like you were always on the outside looking in so to speak? Did you feel like a loaner when in your heart of heart’s you wanted to belong to someone or some group? Did you long to be a part of a relationship that was fulfilling? We all do!!

In the chart above there is a lie attached to every soul need wound and there is a truth ready to replace the lie.  Who knows, there may be more than one lie attached to each of your soul wounds? Did your father tell you that he loved you? Did he like you? Did he express to you what he thought about you and your future or what you were put on this earth to do? Did he call you names or was his intentions towards you to empower you to be successful? Did he protect you? Was he around to provide for you?

Were your friends and siblings good communicators or companions? Did they leave you out or were you part of the “pack”? Did you have a best friend? Was your friend loyal or were you betrayed?

Was your mom around? Was she capable of being tender and comforting? Did she teach you what you needed to know to go out into the world and make your own way? Were you nurtured so you could learn to nurture too?

If your foundational relationships were unsteady then there is room for God’s touch. It is His opinion that supersedes all other opinions. When He speaks the truth it resounds in the soul like no other sound and hits the mark to heal.

So, where do we begin? Well, if you know God then we have a beginning. If not then ask Him to forgive you your sins, surrender your life to Jesus and ask Jesus come into your heart to be Lord and Savior. He is ready to be there for you. If you need my help in this healing process I can be reached at Laurie@getrealliving.com  Call and ask for me.


In my next blog I will talk more on getting rid of the Orphan Spirit and on forgiveness. I have a space below for comments. Please add your point of view. Until next week…..