Another Day with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD):

Finding Rest:



Hi there I am Laurie. I trust you are having a good Holiday season. You’re probably in the middle of the Christmas rush as I am…This blog is for the adoptive and foster parents and parents of children with behavioral issues. Please check out some of my other posts.

My last post was about letting God fight your battles. This seems a good thing to do but how is it done? Check out my last post. It will help you.

Today’s post is about handling the day in and day out of living with a child who has RAD. How is this done? How can a parent handle the RAD symptoms from their children and not go crazy or get discouraged?

How is it done?

Well, if you have the answer please let me know. Living with RAD symptoms from a foster or adopted child definitely wears a parent out. There are days where you probably want to pull your hair out or give up. I understand. I was there at one time.

There are only a couple of suggestions I have for you:

  1. Take regular breaks or nights off.
  2. Go on a “get away” with friends or spouse occasionally without your children.
  3. Steward your children instead of owning them.

Take Regular breaks or Nights Off:

        When faced with a way of life that is grueling and won’t end soon, it is important to alleviate stress as best as you possibly can. Living with ongoing symptoms from an adopted RAD child, as we have already said, is draining. This is not good for your body, soul or spirit and it is ok to need regular breaks. Go out with friends. Laugh and connect with adults who are healthy and supportive. There is no room for guilt when you are doing it for your health and wellbeing. Your body and emotions need the break.

Get Away:

        Then there are times when your body and emotions are crying out for an extended time away from RAD symptoms. Again, there is no guilt in needing to take care of yourself for a while. Your body will thank you and you will be able to come back with renewed vigor and ability to handle responsibilities with wisdom.

Steward Your Children – Don’t Own Them:

I have written on this subject before so I will give a brief description of what I mean. God owns everything on the earth. So, He owns you, me and our children plus all the problems that come with RAD. All the responsibility of or children rests on his shoulders.

We are stewards on behalf of our children. We are to parent our children according to what God wants. How do we do this?

Well I will just give an example. Possibly your children are doing the RAD things which include causing conflict in the family or making decisions which are dangerous. If God owns your children – then tell God what your children are doing and then ask Him what he is going to do about it. He owns everything and is ultimately responsible for them. He will take on the challenge.

It takes the burden off your shoulders and gives God the burden of RAD symptoms connected to our adopted children. Plus, realizing the power to change the heart of an adopted RAD child rest squarely on God’s shoulders. There is no power in ourselves which can produce the change which is necessary to heal our children.


        Blessings during your holiday season. Talk with you next time. Until then…

1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) and the Magic Age of Eighteen: | Abba Father's Love

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