Seeing Past Your Child’s Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) to Their DMA Gifting – Part Two

Seeing Past Your Child’s RAD to Their DNA Gifting



Hi there! I write this blog because I like helping adoptive and foster families. My posts are intended to encourage and give real life examples of life with orphaned children. Please have a look at some of my posts.

My last post was about what is expressed in the title above and I shared about the prophetic gifts found in Rom. 12:6-8. I gave several personality traits that go along with this gift. Please check it out.

Today I am going to continue with the second, third and fourth gifts and the personality traits that go with them. The purpose is for you to see if your adopted or foster child has one or a combination of one or two of these gifts which make up their personality.

The second, third and fourth gifts are servant, teacher and exhorter (in that order). I will give strengths and weaknesses for each gift. Each gift also has blind spots.


Servant Gift Strengths, Weaknesses and Blindspots:

  1. Wants to make people feel welcomed
  2. Sees external needs and wants to meet them and has a hard time saying no to helping others
  3. Are very practical
  4. Loves to be life-giving to others
  5. Wants to be behind the scenes and not in the spotlight
  6. Wants to be part of the team and is extremely loyal
  7. Wants clear instructions
  8. Remembers likes and dislikes of others
  9. Will do what others won’t step up to do
  10. Wants short term not open ended projects
  11. Attracts dishonor and shame especially from family
  12. Is competitive


  1. Struggles to affirm themselves or receive affirmation from others. Repeatedly apologizes
  2. Makes excuses to justify bad behavior from others. Can be enablers. They spoil children by meeting too many needs.
  3. Struggles with shame and can believe they are a victim.
  4. Can become exhausted by meeting the needs of others.


Teacher Gift Strengths, Weaknesses and Blindspots:

  1. Has a passion for truth. Needs to validate facts for themselves
  2. Wants first hand details
  3. Enjoys learning new things and sharing it with others
  4. Prefers old, established and validated ways
  5. Has a deep commitment to family and tradition
  6. Always is wary of deception. New truth is viewed initially with suspicion
  7. Processes slowly and avoids risk
  8. Tends to procrastinate in certain areas of their life
  9. Usually the last one to speak in a group
  10. Sense of humor and quick-witted
  11. Slows down impulsive people who jump to conclusions. Is not easily swayed from the truth
  12. Asks lots of questions, trying to establish the truth
  13. Doesn’t like to impose responsibility onto others which can lead to not confronting sin


  1. The need to analyze and the endless questions can be tiresome and wearisome to others. They can feel not trusted
  2. Passion for knowledge and sharing knowledge can come across as intellectual superiority
  3. May seem passive because they give chance after chance
  4. Struggles with timeliness and responsibility in selective areas


Exhorter Gift Strengths, Weaknesses and Blindspots:

  1. People oriented and has never met a stranger
  2. Get their energy from being with others
  3. Has a God given ability to love people
  4. Brings laughter into all situations
  5. Tactful and has dreams and vision on a big scale
  6. Excellent public speaker and uses stories to communicate to others – which is how they share wisdom
  7. Natural at evangelism
  8. Networks and teams with others well
  9. Is able to disagree without alienating others. Skilled at reconciliation
  10. Able to speak to people in a gracious way to bring them along
  11. Motivated by relationship, persuasion and approval of people
  12. Their schedule is full and has a commanding presence
  13. Can be perceived by others as being superficial or compensating because of their humor and ability to work the room
  14. The depth and wisdom in them is not always appreciated due to their light-heartedness


  1. Lacks discipline of time
  2. People pleasing and accommodating. May fail to confront because they don’t want to cause offense.
  3. May promise more than they intended
  4. Because of their big personality they can easily become the focus of attention


        Come back next week for the last three spiritual DNA gifts. Ill wrap everything up having to do with this series of posts. Until then…


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