Delusions of Grandeur and Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) – What?

Delusions of Grandeur:



Hi everyone – I am glad you are reading my post! For those who have just joined us – I am Laurie and I created this post for the parents of children with behavioral, foster and adoption issues. I’m sure you will find the information in my posts helpful. Please take a moment to read some.

My last post was about how God plays a role in our healing. It relates to the three posts right before my last post. Please take a little time to check them out. I included a chart for your information.

Today I am going to talk about delusions of grandeur and how this issue can have a connection in the more severe cases of RAD. Please find the definition of delusions of grandeur below. I hope you will gain some insight into your RAD child.


Definition of Delusions of Grandeur: (taken from The Free Dictionary app.)

Delusions of Grandeur – a delusion (common in paranoia) that you are much greater and more powerful and influential than you really are.


How Can This Apply to RAD?

         As the definition above states – it is common in paranoia. I am a Life Coach and not a psychologist so what I have to say is my own opinion. But, RAD children spend a great deal of time in a fantasy world which they sometimes believe more than reality.

My second adopted daughter (who has a low IQ) believes to this day she will get into the police force and then graduate to FBI agent. Also, as a child (she is an adult now) she was sure her birth mom and eighteen brothers and sisters (she only has one sister) wanted her home in her native country. Then she decided to kill me or get me out of the house so her birth mom could come here to marry my husband. If that didn’t work she was going to kill me so she could marry my husband.

Along with the above fantasies – she was sure everyone adored her and she was on her way to being a rock star. At school – all the kids didn’t like her. She was deemed the bully of the classroom.

My first adopted daughter wanted my husband to herself so she tried to get my husband and I divorced. She acted so sweet and kind to me in public and when my husband was around. But, as soon as my husband left our house or was out of town – all hell broke loose. She would lie and played weak and helpless when I told him the truth. One day my husband happened to walk in of one of her rages and that was the end of her delusion. Therapy came next and all her plans of causing us to divorce came to an abrupt end.


My Point:

         These RAD adopted or foster children many times have delusions of grandeur and put all their efforts into making them come true. Both my girls did not think rationally. They both thought we stole them from their country. They had no proof except what they thought their delusions told them. We had the adoption decree proof but they were sure their delusions were correct and we were lying.


How We Handled Their Delusions:

         It is like talking to deaf ears with RAD children. My husband and I worked with our daughters on many issues – to no avail. So, we decided we were going to let life tell them the truth.

Our second adopted daughter is still in her delusion of being a FBI agent. It won’t happened and we feel life will have to teach her the truth. Telling her differently just makes her angry and then she punishes us. We will just wait till the truth dawns on her and be there for her when reality kicks in.

Life taught our first adopted daughter a life lesson a while ago when her delusion of living alone with her adoptive father (my husband) and causing us to divorce didn’t happen. She of course was in a rage and had to deal with reality. Her delusion and the attached punishment didn’t work.



I am not saying this is the way you should handle your children with delusions. It is just what worked for us. We just let life teach the lesson and it brought our first adopted daughter to the truth. We are still waiting for the truth to dawn on our second adopted daughter.

Many times life lessons can be a friend to a person who lives in delusions of grandeur. The exception is if their delusion puts them in danger. Then of course intervention is crucial.

Hope this was helpful. I’ll be here again next week with another post. Talk with you then…


1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Trackback: Why Me and RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder)? | Abba Father's Love

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