RAD and Back to School

RAD and Back to School:

 Intro:

Here we are in the fall of 2016. I’m Laurie and RAD (Reactive Attachment Disorder) and adoption issues are what this blog is all about. Please check out my other posts on the subject.

My last post was about the atmosphere in your home. I gave some helpful tips to make your home more positive. Take a moment and have a look at my last post.

Today I am going to talk about RAD and getting your RAD adopted child back in school for the year. I know this can be a challenging season. That is what we are going to talk about today.

 

Thoughts on School Starting:

One of my RAD adopted children struggled with schedule changes and going back to school. She needed an IEP set up for several reasons but most of it was because of behavioral issues. All forms of change were difficult for her and she had a hard making and keeping friends. Mainly because she punished everyone around her.

My other RAD adopted child loved going back to school. For her it was another avenue of lying, manipulation and charming in order to misrepresent and triangulate adults against each other. She also tried to triangulate her friends against my husband and me. This was her target audience and she loved the opportunity of playing on people’s emotions so they would feel sorry for her.

 

Permission to Take a Much Needed Break:

         Summertime was probably challenging for your family. I know it was for our family for several reasons. RAD children need a focus and during the summer – you were their focus. All of the anger and revenge your child carries was probably delivered to you (especially if you are the adoptive mother). This is very hurtful and damaging to the soul.

School starting can be helpful especially to the adoptive mother. Getting relief from the abuse that RAD children give out is necessary. Relief happens when school starts so don’t feel guilty about enjoying it.

So, when RAD adopted children start school in the fall it is OK to like having a break from constant RAD issues. It’s also OK to take a day off to reset and relax or do something you love to do. Plan a break ahead of time and make it meaningful. Maybe include a friend in the plan.

Whatever you come up with – enjoy it to your hearts content. Make it an annual event. Your body, soul and spirit will thank you and you’ll receive the health benefits of rest.

Maybe your spouse needs a break too. Set up the sitter if you’re taking longer than school hours and go and be with your spouse. Recoup and get to know each other again. Talk about what you are dreaming for when the children are grown and out of the house and encourage each other.

 

The Point:

         The point is to reconnect with the whole of your life – not just the portion that carries the responsibility of parenting. You have a destiny beyond children. Dreaming of the future with your spouse is beneficial. It allows your heart to believe there is still good events and relationships ahead.

The only thing about taking a break is when the break is over – life is still moving on and you need to join back in. So, savor every morsel of your break. Drink in all the positives and restful recouping. Then come home refreshed and ready to move forward.

 

Conclusion:

         Well, I hope this was helpful!! Please leave a comment in the box below so we can connect in positive conversation. See you next week…

 

 

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  1. Trackback: RAD Support Groups: | Abba Father's Love

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